My Body, Your Soul
by girl-of-many-faces
Summary: At first he thinks it's nothing, just a side effect of being transferred fully from his human mind into his Na'vi one. The problem is that it just gets worse. Rated T for safety.


**AN /: This idea has been with me for a while, and I'm really glad that I've gotten around to writing it. I also hope its semi-original because I haven't really been browsing the Avatar section much to find out.**

**Disclaimer:** 'Avatar' and all its characters belong to James Cameron, I'm simply taking them for one hell of an emotional joy ride, I make no profit from this.

O.o.O.o.O

**My Body, Your Soul**

At first he thinks it's nothing, just a side effect of being transferred fully from his human mind into his Na'vi one. He shakes it off and continues with the rebuilding process, throwing himself into the work and falling down exhausted every night. The problem is that it doesn't go away. This voice in the back of his mind, a young man, crying and scared, it doesn't fade. He doesn't tell anyone, not a soul, but the voice in his head cries as he falls asleep and every night he wishes that he had said something.

O.o.O.o.O

"Neytiri,' he says one day,' do you ever... hear voices... in your head?"

They are outside, working with a small group to salvage what they can from what is left of Hometree. Neytiri looks across at him from where she is bent over what appears to be a string of black beads, giving him a quizzical, worried look.

"Only when I am with Eywa,' she replies,' is this what you mean, Jakesulli?"

_Oh_, he thinks to himself,_ this can't be good_.

"Yeah, sort of." He replies out loud, smiling reassuringly. Neytiri's mouth curls into a frown but she doesn't question him further.

O.o.O.o.O

It gets worse. The voice starts to talk to him.

It's, no, _his_, name is Teemu, and he is growing less scared and keeps asking why he can't feel his body as they move. Whenever Jake replies, which he doesn't do often, it is always out loud, and he is sure that some of his fellow tribe members think he has a few screws loose.

O.o.O.o.O

Teemu is always there now, talking to him, asking questions. The damn voice just never shuts up. He has lost the scared edge and is now curious, has an almost child-like fascination with the way thing work, always begging Jake to explain things. He is better at replying, and can now talk to Teemu inside his mind, although he tends to gain a faraway look in his eyes whenever he does.

He starts to enjoy talking to Teemu. Together they come up with great ideas, intricate plans, wonderful stories. Together they find another tree that the Omaticaya can call home, one that is hidden deep in the jungle near a stream that gurgles softly as it flows on past. Teemu chatters at him ceaselessly as they inspect it, talking about where to start carving into the wood to make a set of stairs, talking about how pretty the plants look when they glow at night, talking about how Neytiri would love the view from the top.

Jake accepts that there is a voice in his mind and starts to become more relaxed about it, even though voices in your head are a sure sign that you are going crazy. If all Teemu does is chatter, he's pretty sure he can deal with that.

O.o.O.o.O

"Jakesulli?"

"What is it?"

"Why can't I walk?"

"You're in my mind. I do the walking."

"But we're in the same body. Why can you walk when I cannot?"

"You're just a figment of my imagination. You're not real. I'm real, and I can walk."

"How do you know that you are real?"

"... I just know."

"But I _feel_ real. Doesn't that make me real?"

"No, it doesn't."

O.o.O.o.O

For a while Teemu is quiet. Jake relishes in this silence, he can finally hear his own thoughts without having Teemu question them, and things just get better when Neytiri tells him that she is pregnant, tears of joy streaming down her face as he embraces her in a hug that seems strong enough to crack her bones. Teemu doesn't even interrupt his thoughts when the baby finally arrives, but he is too drunk on his own bliss to care.

O.o.O.o.O

When he wakes up one morning a few months later he finds that he is sitting in the branches of a the new Hometree, watching the sun set. Neytiri sits next to him, watching their little girl, who they have named Saah'me, crawl around in the branches with an anxious eye.

"How did I get up here?" he says to himself.

"We climbed,' Neytiri says with a bemused look on her face,' do you not remember? You wanted to watch the sun set."

The problem is, Jake realises, no, he _can't_ remember. All he remembers is going to sleep the previous night. He shakes his head wearily, and then freezes up as he hears the familiar voice in his head.

"It is beautiful, is it not,' Teemu says, his voice soft, respectful,' it is a beautiful life that we share."

"Share?" Jake asks, not liking what he hears.

"We have the same body, the same life." Teemu replies.

"This is my life, not yours,' Jake snaps in reply,' you aren't real."

Teemu goes silent, and Jake smiles smugly to himself, knowing that he has won the argument, and that this figment of his imagination has been put in his place.

O.o.O.o.O

His fingers move. They flex out and then curl into a fist, and Jake is a little bit worried now, because it wasn't him that did it.

"My life." Teemu says quietly, and his voice is horrifyingly assertive.

O.o.O.o.O

He doesn't know what to think when Teemu starts to fight for control of their body. He doesn't even know how a figment of his imagination _can_ fight for control, because that's all Teemu is, just a whisper, a shadow.

The rest of the clan is starting to worry about him, because trying to regain use of an arm that is already midway through reaching out to grab a tree branch usually results in him falling straight to the ground. In the back of his mind he hears Teemu laugh as he brushes himself off and reassures his fellow hunters that he is okay.

O.o.O.o.O

Teemu is stronger.

He's having a hard time just moving his own fingers. The one thing he can still use is his mouth, and he is worried that that too will soon be gone. He wakes up with gaps in his memory more frequently and is no longer in control of most of his limbs.

He isn't sure how much longer he can fight, and so one night he wills himself with all his might to envelop Neytiri in his arms as they are watching Saah'me play in the evening light. Neytiri tenses at the sudden gesture but eventually loosens up, craning her neck around to look at him.

"Is something wrong, Jakesulli?" she asks, and Jake doesn't reply right away, simply soaking in the feel of her skin, how her hair tickles his neck, watching as his daughter swings through the branches.

"Nothing's wrong,' he replies eventually, choking on his words as his arms pull away of their own accord.

O.o.O.o.O

He can no longer control his own body. Not his arms, not his voice, he can't even blink of his own accord. Teemu controls everything.

"Why are you doing this?" he shouts.

"You took a life." Teemu replies softly.

"I never killed anyone, what are you talking about?"

"I never said anything about killing,' Teemu replies, and his voice gains an icy edge,' you took my body. You took _my_ life."

"It's not _your_ body! My DNA is in here as well, I have every right to this body!"

"You gave up that right when you did not believe I was really here. Once I thought we could share this body, but now I know that there is room for only one."

Outside his mind, Neytiri is braiding Saah'me's hair. They are sitting quietly, talking happily, unaware that anything is wrong. He wishes he could kiss Neytiri one last time, wishes he could scoop his daughter up in his arms and hug her so tight, just one last time.

"I want them back."

"They're mine now."

"But they're _my_ family, you don't belong with them!"

"You never gave me a chance to belong,' Teemu says, and despite the relaxed sprawl of their body his voice cuts daggers through Jake's heart. Well, maybe through his soul, seeing as that heart was no longer his.

"Please,' Jake begs,' please, we can figure something else out. We can still share!"

"A life for a life. Now you will know what it feels like, to always see but never touch."

"GO! AWAY!" Jake shouts.

"I AM NO LONGER YOURS TO CONTROL!" Teemu shrieks back, and forces Jake down.

O.o.O.o.O

Deep down, he cannot see, he cannot feel, he cannot hear. He is trapped.

He can no longer feel the breeze against his skin, can no longer see Neytiri, can no longer hold Saah'me in his arms.

Deep down in the smallest corner of the prison of his mind, Jake Sully throws his head towards the blackness above him and _screams_.

**End**


End file.
